Good morning!
So back to my early morning blogging. A day probably doesn't pass for most of us when we don't think about love and friendship. That old cliche 'Love makes the world go round' used liberally and often without much thought, captured in sentimental Hallmark cards, soaring songs, poetry, ubiquitous and woven into the fabric of all of our lives. The truth is that without it life is impoverished, it gives rise to many wonderful and beautiful actions. It saturates the emotional, physical and spiritual life. It surprises, hurts, guides, leads us into relationship with others. Most songs, poems, dramas have it central to their expression, even in its absence.
Much of who and what we love is mysterious. We can rationalise our relationships and justify our reasons, but love is the invisible glue that holds our lives together through the rites of passage we must all pass through.
For an actor to achieve his purpose as a lightening rod and channel for an idea, image, story and character he must be vigilant in his work on his own life experiences. To be able to bring a rich palette of emotion and thought to the creation of a character, she must excavate relentlessly the nuances and subtleties of relationship. Its a deep well. The actor must learn to open himself to possibility and to the ever changing art of love and friendship, as this is where his most profound resource lies. Whilst we often talk about the artificial and fabricated nature of drama, deep within its power lies the complexity and nuance of life. Its why we are drawn to other people's stories, in some way they each give voice to a part of ourselves. We use them as a yardstick for our own experience, and thereby understand both the commonality and difference in a human life.
The language of love and friendship is often best expressed through art and poetry. Somehow metaphor and image speak to the deepest mysterious parts of our soul, that struggle to be expressed or understood in the venacular. And it really doesn't matter whether its classical or popular music, a trashy novel or a masterpiece, Sondheim or Shakespeare. All of these speak to people in their various ways about what it is to be human. Art moves us.
The Greeks were much more attentive to the definitions of love.They had four
different words -
Philia (φιλία philía) means affectionate regard or friendship in both ancient and modern Greek. It is a dispassionate virtuous love, a concept developed by Aristotle. It includes loyalty to friends, family, and community, and requires virtue, equality and familiarity. In ancient texts, philos denoted a general type of love, used for love between family, between friends, a desire or enjoyment of an activity, as well as between lovers.
Storge (στοργή storgē) means "affection" in ancient and modern Greek. It is natural affection, like that felt by parents for offspring. Rarely used in ancient works, and then almost exclusively as a descriptor of relationships within the family. It is also known to express mere acceptance or putting up with situations, as in "loving" the tyrant.
I am a great fan of the writer and philosopher Thomas Moore and in his book Soul Mates he talks about friendship - I quote:
Friendship: A Vessel of Soul-Making (Chapter 5, page 93)
In addition to whole worlds of imagination, friendship offers the soul intimacy and relatedness. Many parts of life go along fine without intimate connections. Work doesn't necessarily ask for intimate relationships, and it is possible for political and social life to be carried out without intimacy, too. But without intimacy, soul goes starving, for the closeness provided by intimate relationships fulfils the soul's very nature. Family, home, marriage, hometown, memories, personal and family stories - each gives the soul the containment it requires. Jung described the ideal setting of soul-work as an alchemical Vas, a glass vessel in which all the stuff of the soul could be contained. Friendship is one such vessel, keeping the soul stuff together where it can go through its operations and processes. In times of emotional struggle, our first recourse might be to talk with friends, for we know that our most difficult material is safe with a friend, and that the friendship can hold our thoughts and feelings, no matter how painful or unusual, as we sift through them and watch them unfold.
In the practice of friendship, we might keep this important aspect of soul in mind: its need for containment. Our capacity to keep a secret could be important to a friend who may feel free to talk to us in a spirit of confidentiality. A friend could also offer containment by receiving another's feelings and thoughts without a strong need for interpretation or commentary. Sometimes of course, we ask friends to offer their opinions and judgements, but even then we expect a high degree of acceptance and recognition of who we are. In friendship, we want to receive and be received.
And so it is with the odyssey we each embark on! I am blessed with good friends and they are my teachers. Through them my life and work is enriched. The palette is wide, varied, and ever changing.
Have a good chat with a friend today - and let them know you love them!
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| My friend Amari and I playing scrabble yesterday - She won! |
Much of who and what we love is mysterious. We can rationalise our relationships and justify our reasons, but love is the invisible glue that holds our lives together through the rites of passage we must all pass through.
For an actor to achieve his purpose as a lightening rod and channel for an idea, image, story and character he must be vigilant in his work on his own life experiences. To be able to bring a rich palette of emotion and thought to the creation of a character, she must excavate relentlessly the nuances and subtleties of relationship. Its a deep well. The actor must learn to open himself to possibility and to the ever changing art of love and friendship, as this is where his most profound resource lies. Whilst we often talk about the artificial and fabricated nature of drama, deep within its power lies the complexity and nuance of life. Its why we are drawn to other people's stories, in some way they each give voice to a part of ourselves. We use them as a yardstick for our own experience, and thereby understand both the commonality and difference in a human life.
The language of love and friendship is often best expressed through art and poetry. Somehow metaphor and image speak to the deepest mysterious parts of our soul, that struggle to be expressed or understood in the venacular. And it really doesn't matter whether its classical or popular music, a trashy novel or a masterpiece, Sondheim or Shakespeare. All of these speak to people in their various ways about what it is to be human. Art moves us.
The Greeks were much more attentive to the definitions of love.They had four
different words -
Philia (φιλία philía) means affectionate regard or friendship in both ancient and modern Greek. It is a dispassionate virtuous love, a concept developed by Aristotle. It includes loyalty to friends, family, and community, and requires virtue, equality and familiarity. In ancient texts, philos denoted a general type of love, used for love between family, between friends, a desire or enjoyment of an activity, as well as between lovers.I am a great fan of the writer and philosopher Thomas Moore and in his book Soul Mates he talks about friendship - I quote:
Friendship: A Vessel of Soul-Making (Chapter 5, page 93)
In addition to whole worlds of imagination, friendship offers the soul intimacy and relatedness. Many parts of life go along fine without intimate connections. Work doesn't necessarily ask for intimate relationships, and it is possible for political and social life to be carried out without intimacy, too. But without intimacy, soul goes starving, for the closeness provided by intimate relationships fulfils the soul's very nature. Family, home, marriage, hometown, memories, personal and family stories - each gives the soul the containment it requires. Jung described the ideal setting of soul-work as an alchemical Vas, a glass vessel in which all the stuff of the soul could be contained. Friendship is one such vessel, keeping the soul stuff together where it can go through its operations and processes. In times of emotional struggle, our first recourse might be to talk with friends, for we know that our most difficult material is safe with a friend, and that the friendship can hold our thoughts and feelings, no matter how painful or unusual, as we sift through them and watch them unfold.
In the practice of friendship, we might keep this important aspect of soul in mind: its need for containment. Our capacity to keep a secret could be important to a friend who may feel free to talk to us in a spirit of confidentiality. A friend could also offer containment by receiving another's feelings and thoughts without a strong need for interpretation or commentary. Sometimes of course, we ask friends to offer their opinions and judgements, but even then we expect a high degree of acceptance and recognition of who we are. In friendship, we want to receive and be received.And so it is with the odyssey we each embark on! I am blessed with good friends and they are my teachers. Through them my life and work is enriched. The palette is wide, varied, and ever changing.
Have a good chat with a friend today - and let them know you love them!
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